ain't no feeling like being free - going natural :)

so i did it! i finally had the BC (big chop) and i couldn't more in love with the look. of course, before making the decision, i had been transitioning from having relaxers every six weeks to just going cold turkey.

i didn't even see the chris rock documentary "good hair", but going natural had been a though in my mind since fall 2009. i just wanted to take time to make sure that i was really ready to take the next step.

i've gotten such a positive response for my hair, and i'm sure that there will be some nay-sayers, but so what! i took this step for me, and i couldn't be happier. i know that this journey is going to have some ups and downs, but i'm ready for it.

this is more than just a physical appearance change for me, but i feel like i've let so much go by cutting off my hair *cue free by destiny's child* but seriously...there is something about going natural that makes a female become so much more in tune with her inner and outer beauty. i believe that india.arie said it best in the hit song "i am not my hair" that it's about the soul that lives within =]

there is such a large community on the internet of young women that have natural hair, and i've already got a number of fave blogs and youtube channels that support the go natural movement. i think that i chose the perfect time to make the choice of going natural, and i can't wait to see the evolution of my hair. as always, i will be sharing with you all my progress as i take this journey.

☮ and ♥, 

-*csc.

a case of "angry black woman" syndrome?

am i the only who sometimes feels a little guilty at times when i fall into the category of the "angry black woman"? you know, the one with a lot of attitude, rolling the neck and trying to always cuss someone out to prove her point sometimes? here's an example...

now while some (and i do mean very few) of those characteristics may come from me at times, it's not always so. yesterday, one of the people i'm on this trip with blatantly stated (right in front of my face too) that i was mean and seemed "scared" to come up and stand near me for a picture. in another instance, one girl on the trip told my roommate that she thinks that i don't like her. this could easily be because i've usually got quick comebacks and can be witty when i want to or i may be a little stand-offish at times, but other than that, i'm a little taken a back at why this would be.


am i looking into these two instances too much?

these two individuals could just be joking and usually back in syracuse, i throw the deuces and don't care, because that's their problem and not mine. no, i do not (nor do i ever) feel the need to "represent" for my race/culture on this trip nor am i trying to play some sort of victim. this could simply be a case of when i need to check my ego at the door, but i do feel as if though i should be educating these individuals, not only about generalizations of black females, but also about me as a person. sure i can sassy and maybe a little snappy at times, but i'm also sophisticated, sensitive, independent and rather friendly.

on the contrary though,  trips like this have taught me that people only take you for face value, and that's totally understandable. it's only six weeks and personally, i don't expect to share my whole life with these people. i've done my part to be nice on this trip, and that's that. i just don't like the whole notion of people jumping to conclusions about who i am with out really getting to know me because that sh*t right there is for the birds.

but putting everything in perspective, i guess it does give me yet another chance to learn about the type of person i am and somethings that i may need to work on because after all, this thing we call life isn't a destination but rather a journey :)

☮ and ♥, 

-*csc.